Yes, it’s possible.

Just the other night I was asked,

“If you’re married, how can it be rape?”

No matter how many times I have been asked this question in the past,it still amazes me that so many people continue to ask it.

The true understanding of rape, even sexual assault, comes from recognizing and comprehending the difference between an act that is sexual in nature and, an act to gain and/or maintain power and control over a person. These are two very different acts that should not be misinterpreted to be one and the same.

Rape is an act of power and control. The sexual nature of rape is just the means used to gain and/or maintain power and control over a person.

When one understands this fact, one will understand that rape in a marriage is very possible.

April 1st, 2012 …

For those of you who don’t know … the first of April ends Women’s Month and brings in the Month of two special issues in the United States:  National Child Abuse Awareness and Sexual Assault Awareness.  This two issues are intricately related to Domestic Violence, but at the same time, they can also be found in separate situations.  Both issues (and I only use the word ‘issues’ for lack of better words) are abuse.  There is no debate about that and it is a fact that we should all come to realize.

Death by a loved one … poetry form.

Click here: “PLEASE BE ADVISED!” before reading.

This is truly not an easy read, and if you have not yet read “PLEASE BE ADVISED!”, I suggest you do so now.  I wrote the original version of this piece ironically on Valentines Day 2009 and edited it to this poetry version on February 24, 2009 for a contest on WdC.  The reviews I recieved told me how difficult it was to read through this piece, so I implore you now to be cautious of what you are about to read.

I remember when I first wrote this piece, the disassociation was significant.  The words came quick, flowed without hesitation, and it wasn’t until I was finished writing that I realized what I had written.  It took me by surprise when I read each word, and my heart grew heavy as the memory of these nights began to rush in, yet at the same time, I felt freedom.  It was the first time I truly spoke about this, without holding back, without keeping little details buried inside me, without hiding the little truths I thought didn’t need to be said.  I unchained myself, because I allowed my soul to speak up.

Today I share with you one of the “Secrets” I used to keep hidden for almost 10 years.

Secrets.

Click here: “PLEASE BE ADVISED!” before reading.

Secrets. We all know and understand what emotions and struggles come with carrying secrets, but do we all know, understand and comprehend what emotions and struggles come with carrying dark secrets. I don’t think so.

A five year old child knows the guilt and fear of lying to their parents when they say, “I didn’t break it, Mommy. Thomas (their three year old brother) did!”

Children automatically fear the anger, the scolding, the punishment. The disapproving and disappointing looks they’ll get from the people they love most. They tremble from the idea that their wrongdoing might lead to their mother or father no longer loving them, but eventually, guilt kicks in. The weight of the lie, the secret, weighs heavily on them. It becomes too much for them to carry. Some children can’t sleep, some can’t eat, some won’t even talk. The affect of the secret is so strong at times, they yearn for the freedom from the chains and then, when a safe moment arrives, the child comes clean and shares their secret.